Everything seems to be going wrong and there’s a feeling of helplessness and desolation. It’s been a roller coaster ride. Personal dilemmas and work stress collided. Where am I? What’s going on? Where am I going?
I almost lost a great friend. Things are still a little awkward. But I’m pretty sure they’ll be back to normal soon. An inner battle to save my own sanity and what have you. It’s all too complicated. I’m sure, if anyone out there knows me, he would understand where I’m coming from. Or if anyone has ever been in a situation as I described on my previous post, then, maybe, he or she will understand. I am set on making things change within me. It’s difficult. It’s nerve-wrecking. But not impossible.
When everything has been said and done, suddenly, there was a void, a vacuum, sucking me in, and I felt like I was going to implode. I craved for my friend. But I couldn’t find him. I pushed him away. I felt empty.
It was a harsh realization. I still feel its sharp teeth gnawing slowly, eating me up, inch by inch. How can I get out of this situation? I wanna know.
Complicated by my stressful new position at work, I find myself in a losing streak. Help?
Hoy
Said this at 7:45am:You did lose a great friend. You just never noticed. And I don’t think you really care. That one day, moment, in time, you pushed too hard. Maybe you didn’t know it. Maybe you didn’t care. Maybe is was purposeful.
You see, those that care to know you, truly care for you (and know this site exists). You’re not the only one that is afraid to say ‘I love you’ sometimes.
Paalam.
Don
Said this at 10:47am:Great! Not exactly the kind of help I was looking for, but thank you nevertheless for letting me know. If I cared enough to tell that other person how I felt, maybe you should too.
Hoy
Said this at 11:30am:Fine. Mahal kita, Donald Villapando. Mahal kita.
Don
Said this at 11:40am:Who are you?
Hoy
Said this at 12:11pm:You’re a smart pinoy. You’ll figure it out. But since you obviously didn’t really read my first post, maybe not. If you do, you won’t care.
Don
Said this at 4:27pm:I don’t know who you are, or have any clue. All I know is that you’re using an internet provider based in Woodstock, Virginia. I don’t know anyone from there. If you really know me, then you should know better than to play mind games.
tuarim
Said this at 11:06pm:Sometimes we find out that what we want and hope for will never be.
Sometimes, we push those away cause we are scared.
Sometimes, just sometimes, things happen without knowing why or how to fix them.
Don, if you feel you pushed someone away, find that person and try to patch it up. If he is has been a good friend, then, in time, the friendship will heal…it may not be as it was for somethings can never go back to how they are. Trust me, I know this all to well.
Hoy
Said this at 10:11pm:Well put. Very poignant.
Don
Said this at 10:20pm:Thank you for the kind words, Sean.
The past few days have been very enlightening. Thanksgiving became more special to me after having realized that I had not lost him at all. Everything is going well and I have my friend back.
Don
Said this at 1:21pm:Hoy, who are you?
Hoy
Said this at 7:12pm:Trust me, you really don’t care.
Don
Said this at 7:19pm:How can I care for someone who chooses to remain anonymous? Seriously, dude or dudette, either tell me who you are or just hold your peace. I am not out to play mystery games. I’ve got too many things on my plate right now, and I certainly have no time for this.
You wouldn’t know if I cared or not because you’re not allowing me to. It’s not my problem anymore.